RP Confusion, an OOC Commentary
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Yup, I'm back to post-dating posts again. The majority of this really is a couple of days old though, so it's all good. Really!
Last night I had an interesting chat with the human behind my vamp's childer-to-be, Veronique. It all started with her saying that Ver was in about three different places doing three different things-- all within a single group. I laughed, knowing full well that Creide herself exists in countless different realms and times.
Indeed, simply looking at her places of residence can be confusing. It began in the Asylum, where she first found a home with her companion. Then... on moving to the main clan she found herself sharing another set of rooms with him. The same happened in the KoH board. Next, she moved into the then-home of Clan White Dragon and finally had a room to herself-- and her first office! When the clan grew and made their home in a new castle, guess who went too. Another set of living quarters, another office.
TVRP is by far the crowning glory of her home-making hobby. Finally a keep that belongs solely to Oneirus and her, designed to their specifications and bearing still more offices. (Sensing a theme here?) Ah, but then AQel agreed to give her an office inside the Asylum itself-- with, I might add, a window.
If you take each of these groups and add to them the various threads and storylines, plus another group or two, Creide in fact exists in about eight different places at any given moment. Talk about confusion! Now that O has left the clan, C's world is even more divided. In TVRP he is there with her as always. However, in the Heorotian world she is heartbroken, missing him terribly.
Alas, all is not well for her. Right now my poor vamp is getting a wee bit mixed up. She has all these different feelings due to various events... but the problem is that they can't be allowed to intermingle. So no matter how she feels towards someone in one place or even in chatting privately, she is forced to ignore that completely elsewhere. Perhaps the most profound example being her current living situation.
Presuming that they manage to survive the chaos and decimation of a demon vs. vampire war in TVRP, C will return home with her companion and sleep as ever by his side, curled up against him and trying to ignore his snores. *lol*
On the other hand... at the end of a long, hard night she returns home in the Asylum and all places Heorotian to find nothing but an empty space waiting for her. Oneirus has packed his belongings and gone completely, leaving her alone with her thoughts and wishes. Companionship in one place, solitude in the others.
At times I feel a bit sorry for her, but then again it is rather amusing from a human perspective. All of her recent exploits have been, really. Still, in a way I almost wish that I could split her character somehow. Or perhaps it is more that Creide herself is beginning to wish she could be two seperate people. In the end, both of us are probably wondering the same thing-- just when will it all become too much for her?
Knowing... is Not Half the Battle
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
I imagine it is hardly surprising that I have known of O's plans to leave the clan for some time now. It is an idea we both have considered at various times and I knew the day was coming. As my childer-to-be noted yesterday, his upcoming departure has been at the back of part of my dark mood of late. Yet... when the moment actually came yesterday, prior knowledge hardly mattered. Never have I seen so many vampires in tears over a loss, nor have I ever felt so... *sigh*
It is strange really. Though my human keeps reminding me that it is not really the end of things (as his post said, I know where to find him) I still feel an overwhelming sense of loss. For a time... Oneirus was all I had in the clan. There was a time when I felt isolated and out of place-- but he accepted me for who and what I was becoming rather than what I had been. I know he says I had a hand in helping him achieve his current... er, O-ness. The truth of it though, is that he had a much bigger part in helping me become the Creide I am today.
From the beginning he and his human encouraged (ok, badgered) me to make my way in the clan, to find myself and my voice, become who I wished to be. He has been the driving force behind much of my creativity and constantly played the dual role of Task Master and pompom toting cheerleader.
Our partnership has allowed me to get to know a side of him that few caught more than a glimpse of-- and for that I am truly grateful. Beneath the destruction and rebelliousness lies a wonderfully unique and intelligent character. Behind the angry vampire and his many personas is a talented writer and imaginative creator. At the heart of it all is an amazing sense of fun, a desire for light-hearted laughter-- yet at the same time the rare ability to reach seriousness of a depth not often seen in the world of vampire RP.
Each of us lucky enough to have been touched by the presence and insanity of O has received a gift beyond measure. With his departure-- and until his eventual return-- so passes the age of fun within the clan. The fun of mudfights and Barrelology, bus trips and machetes. For that reason-- and for all the good times, the occasional not-so-good times and the mostly awesome as hell times-- Oneirus, troublemaker extraordinnaire of Heorot, companion of my heart, I salute you and name your time with Heorot The Age of O. *pours out Guinness*
